Here Underneath It All

Written September 21st 2009

It’s another second
Another minute
Another hour
Another day
Just one more week
One more month
And then it’s one more year
Fifty two weeks
Twelve months
And three hundred sixty five days
And every one ticked on by
I kept telling myself that I’d get better
That I’d do better
That it was just one more day

Wasting moments
Wasting opportunities
Wasting talents
Wasting precious potential
Wasting so much time
As I watch my life just waste away

Round and round
With the beat of the drum
Chasing myself into dizzy spells
Spent energy in the circle I keep getting stuck on

Another tear
Another lonely day
Wasted time searching for a meaning
Wasted another part of my life away

I know if I want the things that I’ve been dreaming of
That I’ve got to make a change
But where do I start
In the middle of this chaos and confusion
I’m picking up the pieces
Not knowing what I’m building
Where it’s going or where I’m meant to be ending up

Looking for an answer in amongst the questions
Knowing that what I’m searching for is in me
That home that I’d been longing for was here all along
And so lies the precious gifts that I’ve been given
Here somewhere underneath it all

Random Personality Test :D

ENFP - "Journalist". Uncanny sense of the motivations of others. Life is an exciting drama. 8.1% of total population.

Take Free Jung Personality Test
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Enneagram Test Results Type 1 Perfectionism |||||||||| 33% Type 2 Helpfulness |||||||||||||||||||| 83% Type 3 Image Awareness |||||||||||||||||||| 83% Type 4 Sensitivity |||||||||||||||| 70% Type 5 Detachment |||||||||| 40% Type 6 Anxiety |||||||||||||||| 66% Type 7 Adventurousness |||||||||||||||| 66% Type 8 Aggressiveness |||||||||||||| 56% Type 9 Calmness |||||||||||||| 60% Your main type is 3 Your variant is sexual

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Today I Will Clean My House

When Tuesday night feels like Friday night you know there is something wrong with your life, any day of the week anything goes, drop whatever your doing and just go for a ride with a stranger who becomes a new friend, asking me to the casino. Gotta worry about the people drinking every night and every day, drinking their lives away. Everyone they know is in or out of jail, got this black guy calling me every five minutes, I’m wondering why I was dumb enough to give him my real number, sometimes I’ve gotta wonder where the hell my head is at. Stay out of their lives, just smile and say hi, neighbours ought not to be friends coz when things go wrong you’ve still got to live with them next door and I’m gonna be here a while.
Got my dogs and my computer write my letters and make my art and that’s good enough for me. They can keep their drinks and I’ll stay home instead. Crank my favourite songs, dance round by myself and I’m fine here, no troubles no dramas and that’s the way I like it.
Screw your casino, tonight I’m cleaning my house :D

This is Izzy aka Izzy Bee aka Honey Bee aka Baby Girl
I have no idea what is on the futon next to her :) possibly a shirt ?
She loves cuddles, belly rubs especially, snuggles into me when she's really happy and gives happy licks to let me and everyone else she knows that she loves you, she is obsessed with the tv, wags her tails even when its off and barks and scratches at the screen when she's really excited. her favourite movies so far are snow buddies, dr dolittle, stardust, the golden compass, ice age 1/2/3 and the x files (these all got lots of barking and scratching lol)
loves walkies at the park down the road and loves to curl up on the futon or under my blanket when i'm in bed :D she is pretty mellow especially compared to Penny but plays and barks too. Don't know what I'd do without my Izzy Bee. ^_^

This is miss Penny aka Penny bear aka scruffles aka lil miss :) she is cheeky, mischeivious, hyperactive loves to play and destroy, licks everyone she meets and loves to go bin diving for random items that mess up her mummy's floor. but she will always cheer me up and is the most loyal little puppy. gotta love the Penny ^_^

Blog Start

So here we go with the blog, we'll see how this goes and if i keep it up to date :D
Thanks Del 4 this, more things I have to customize and make an effort with LOL oh life is so damn hard.
Today :
Boredom with a side of dizziness and nausea oh and PS I'm not pregnant and I am actually relieved but my doctor cant find a reason for me feeling sick so after a bunch of blood tests I am now going for a brain scan! was a little scary to hear that I have to do that, brain scans are serious and I am not looking forward to it, the waiting will annoy me more though, public again so waiting will be a few months (we'll see so far their version of a few months is waaaay longer)

Izzy is watching tv intently(it's scary how she looks at it like a human does!) and Penny is destroying her little sheepie toy on the futon. chaos and mess everywhere that I have absolutely no desire to fix or even really acknowledge :D but I washed and dried my hair, so today I have done a small thing at least hahahahaha. can't wait for scrap class on sunday, had a ball a fortnight ago and finally learning what to do with all the stuff I have been accumulating.

and that's about it :D

let me know wot u think of the picture thingy at the top with Lost in the journey on it, i'm not totally satisfied with it but its a start at least plus i cant be bothered tweaking it anymore tonight, gotta love the carpal tunnel NOT!